Mutilating self esteem
64I was invited by a local TV show to talk about Health at every size, but found out on air, that I was brought there to be discredited on live TV.
"For 10 years, this obese woman has been dragging her fat body around, and
calling for the abolition of dieting, not only that, but she tells women that you are beautiful at any size, and age and that you do not need to lose weight to be healthy and happy"
Said the woman presenter, in my introduction report, over images of
headless fatties, people eating and gym rats.
"fat people are too lazy and heavy for exercise" a trainer said.
"I would rather be with an ugly thin woman, than a fat beauty if ever
that existed" a man said in the same report.
I am sad to see the extent of fat phobia, stigma and Fat hatred, I
said, the control the diet industry had on every aspect of your
lives is frightening, I would never use that gym or its trainer,if
that is the way they treat fat people.
I talked about the difference between Healthy living and dieting, size
discrimination, fat phobia, headless fatties, fat love and beauty
But the presenter kept trying to convince me that diets work, that I was
wrong and that thinner is better and more beautiful, she lost 50lb
after the birth of her child she said, and that it is not good to let
oneself become so obese (meaning like me).
They then brought a dietitian on the telephone, and more reinforcements arrived, in the form of callers saying that fat is ugly and unhealthy and fat people deserve to be humiliated, they are
gluttons and they self inflict their own diseases by eating too
much,fat is a disease and should be eliminated.
They then blamed me for exaggerating and alleging that fat people are
badly treated and are discriminated against, no one is discriminating
against or abusing fat people in this country they said.
I explained that I do not have a tribe of Fat people I brought with me
from Mars, (Tima's Fat tribe) but I am talking about your own
families, your children and loved ones, humiliation is emotional abuse
and it should be stopped, the thinness hysteria is dangerous, I said,
I cry when I see people young and old dying to be thin, and fat and
thin people dying of misdiagnoses or harmful surgeries and medication.
This dilemma will never stop as long as society humiliates, harasses,
ostracizes and names and shames fat people.
I declare here and now that we want this abuse to stop, "the cows and
pigs" as you call us, have a voice now, and we say stop discriminating
against us and hurting us,enough is enough. we refuse to be humiliated
and killed for our own good.
By the end of the show the presenter was apologizing for being rude to
me,and said live, Tima is beautiful but the camera puts on 10 lbs
extra, (meaning ,Tima is not as fat as she looks, (her way of
showing support).
The dietitian after a long scientific fight, came to my side, this
shocked the crew and amazed the presenter,who kept asking her are you
sure you are against dieting now?, are you sure you are against thin
models now? you mean you agree with Tima? yes said the dietitian.
Many callers were on my side too.
The people who thought up the show to humiliate me,and sabotage HAES
and size acceptance, were upset that their game blew up in their faces.
I of course did not give them the pleasure to notice that I was aware
of their conspiracy, or that I was upset or angry, the show was live
and I played the game, I was confident, lively, happy and entertaining.
To notice my reactions, the camera had my face on close up all the
time, and showing my body from all angles, I could not let myself
weaken or fail,
I had years of history of fat rights struggle to uphold
and many people who believed in me and who counted on me to be strong
for them I won the battle on Fat phobia and saved my self esteem from mutilation and humiliation, by using knowledge and self confidence.
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Thank you Daphne, I can feel your pain, and that is why I keep on trying to stop size discrimination and emotional abuse of fat children and adults.
Tima, you are so brave and so professional in how you handle yourself in the face of extreme fire. I am awed, humbled, and inspired by you. I am so very proud of you.
I think of all the men and women who have watched you and have heard the first life giving drops of Life and Hope ... precious souls beaten down or no other reason than the cruelty toward them due to size.... Thank you, Bless you.
Thank you Gloria, I get my strength from your feed back and knowing that I am touching lives and helping people gives me power and energy to go on in my work against fat phobia.
Be Happy and Healthy always
Tima
Tima, What a wonderful way to start the weekend; after reading about the TV program you were on, the sun shone brighter and the days ahead spoke of possibilities. You are truly an inspiration! Cheers,
Congratulations Tima, that certainly sounds like a victory to me! Nice to have a warrior like yourself on the front lines.
You were super awesome!! Why has it taken me most of my life to clue into Health At Every Size. From the bottom of my heart, I want to thank you for teaching those of us who are late bloomers (new comers to size acceptance). You might not realize how each of your articles help someone like me. A great big congrats and thanks!
Oh Tima, I am so sorry you had to suffer that humiliation. I am so very proud of you and your convictions.To be able to fight off a group of people (and on live TV non the less) and actually win them over to your side is astounding.Reading your story brought me to tears, there is no way I could have survived such an attack.You are an amazing asset to the fat movement.
Thank you Ladies I am happy to have your support, and glad that I am helping ease the pain of size discrimination and fat phobia, and helpto make the world a safe place for us all to live and be happy.
Tima
It is good to hear that you were able to change some minds on this show though. I think also when under attack like this, it is good to mention the health effects of how you make someone feel, how this can help or harm them, emosional abuse kills..
TIMA!!! You magnificent woman you! You have got to be one of the strongest, most amazing beings to remain steadfast while such vile contempt gets flung at you.Your story had me trembling, laughing, and crying at the same time. I want to be like you when I grow up. ;> (I just turned 56 btw.)Seriously, when things get looking really bad, it gives me hope to realize that even the most ignorant and entrenched people in powerful positions can come around to sanity. Regards-
I have tremendous appreciation for what you are doing, Tima. I'm in complete awe of your bravery, your smarts, your capability to stay cool when all around you the heat of hatred is burning so viciously.The world is blessed to have a fat freedom fighter such as yourself. I have been in fat activism since 1976, and only a very few activists are as incredibly courageous, smart, and self-assured as you are.On behalf of the entire fat world--those awake, those not, and those who stubbornly refuse to awaken--I thank you, and from the bottom of my heart.Warmest regards,
Wow!!! How heroic you are, Tima! I'm so glad you convinced some people on live tv. But even if no one changed their minds, it would have been powerful and convincing to many viewers, I'm sure, to see a fat person stand against bad treatment and bad health stereotypes. I'm so glad for you that you made such a win!
You ROCK! I am so proud of your courage and your fearlessness. You are such a brave woman to be fighting these lies all by yourself. I am surrounded with supportive fat friends which gives me comfort and the strength to go on even if/when I feel overwhelmed. I just wish I could hug your neck, but for now, my words will have to suffice. You are a joy and a blessing to us all.
Honey me always sooooooo proud of you keep up the magnificient work sweetheart. Big hugs from your baby Saffy.
Thank you Saffy, you are a nice girl very supportive and beautiful.
Best wishes
Tima
Thank you Ladies, I am touched by your kind words and encouragment, I get my strength from knowing that I am touching more and more lives and he;ing ease the pain and sufering of the voiceless, helpless, powerless victims of stigma and misunderstanding.
Warm Regards
Tima
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHWuwLNJFwM&fea
See her elegance and graciousness
Yes indeed, she is elegant, gracious and beautiful, a real role model for class , respect, self confidence and dignity.
Thank you Andrea and
Tima
beauty is relative
beautifull for me can be ugly for other but i thind that our mind is ownd by all kinds of propaganda and when the TV say someone is beautifull meaning that is the right think
we have to feel ourselves without the impact of media if we can arrive to do this we will sucsed giving everybody his real value
Thank you all for your kind comments and support
Tima
hi everybody,
Beauty is determined not by just looks. It has got a lot more meanings. I like fat figure ladies. So i don't care the TV presenter.
I am agree with you in your idea and invite any fat woman to love her body with health care
is its possible to be a member of this group, lthough i am not fat ?
We will make everyone change their views about us , coz we are a human beings and we have brains to think and doit alot of things.
good luck sweety and give us mooooooore
thank you great lady ,
best of luck.
^-^
Diala Mousa.
It is important to make the Media aware, that size discrimination and abuse of fat people in the name of health is harmful.
Size discrimination is the last, not only allowed but encouraged abuse of children.
Great article as always Tima
Le Pianiste
Keep up the good work Tima, you are changing the world
Ralf
It is great to know that some one saying, that "Fatima Parker saved my life". I wish Fatima could do more great wonders on this planet. Great human beings are real worth to live, to protect? and save human lives. My regards
Well done Dr Fatima, you have that confidence and personality as a? presenter,and you know your subject well, you are fighting for justice and you will always win, very nice.
Why is the diet industry not letting go, this is a diet free article, but they still put their lies and snake oil advertising all over it, shame on you.
The speck of dust that is in someone's eyes is always very visible as compared to the thorn in their own eyes........Pity them, they do not know what they are doing...
"Do not judge according to appearance, but judge with ...
righteous judgement".....John 7:24
Few
are willing to brave the disapproval of their fellows, the censure of
their colleagues, the wrath of their society. Moral courage is a rarer
commodity than bravery in battle or great intelligence. Yet it is the
one essential, vital quality for those who seek to change a world that yields most painfully to change. And I believe that in this generation those with the courage to enter the moral conflict will find themselves with companions in every corner of the globe.-- John Fitzgerald Kennedy
What a warrior you are Fatima! I am so blown away with admiration of how you handled this horrendous setup! I have bookmarked this article so I can keep referring back to it as a reference for how to handle these vile hatemongers. If I were put in that situation, I'd probably resort to the kind of behavior seen on the Jerry Springer show.
Daphne 3 years ago
"My very brave, beautiful, and aweome Lady, I am ever more proud of you and how you handled this horrendously abusive set up. Thank you for the courage and compassion you showed under fire... giving hope and support to those of us who have been atrosiously abused due to size. thank you